Trauma

Not so long ago my life was controlled by trauma. I felt that the abuse I suffered had broken me. I was damaged. I felt like a time traveler, constantly being thrown into the past by seemingly harmless triggers. The flashback were vivid, I could see, hear, smell, and feel every part of the moments when the abuse occured. The memories were vivid and they were hell.
When I wasn't in the past I was in the future. I was consumed by anxiety. I was terrified of everything that might throw me into an attack. I felt defined by my trauma. I felt controlled. I felt that my identity was PTSD and that I would have to suffer through for the rest of my life.
I spent years in therapy working on coping, dealing, unraveling, and seeking understanding. I learned how to stay present. I learned how to face my demons. I learned to take back my power and ease the pain, but I never thought that I would be free.
Until now.
I have broken through the ceiling. I have reached higher than I ever throught possible.
I have changed my views on trauma. It is not an incurable disease, it is a wound that can heal.
I am so proud of the work that I have done over the last years. I am so proud of the person that I am. I am a survivor and a badass. I have chosen to fight every time and because of that I am here. I am strong. My scars are beautiful, I am beautiful. I am beautiful now, and I was beautiful at the time of my trauma. I am looking forward and for the first time I have so much hope. I have a bright future with limitless possibilities and potential.
Thank you to my incredible friends and family for supporting me. Thank you to my therapist for facilitating my healing. Thank you to my gorgeous husband for the endless support and love. Most of all thank you to me.